From: NothingToxic on Wed, Feb 09 2011 12:49 AM

One of my New Year’s resolutions is to start a Yoga studio.

From: NothingToxic on Wed, Feb 09 2011 12:49 AM

Contrary to mainstream scientific belief, it is indeed NOT wise to stare down a speeding car.

From: NothingToxic on Sun, Feb 06 2011 12:27 AM

It’s raining Russians! Hallelujah! I wish it was all of them!

From: NothingToxic on Sat, Feb 05 2011 12:11 AM

No one wants necrophile dogs at the pound.

From: NothingToxic on Sat, Feb 05 2011 12:11 AM

Do you think Jesus and his father, God, have bets going on who wins?

From: NothingToxic on Thu, Feb 03 2011 11:52 PM

What glass jaws on these two!

From: NothingToxic on Thu, Feb 03 2011 11:52 PM

That was a gold medal compound fracture.

From: NothingToxic on Wed, Feb 02 2011 11:49 PM

Ask a Turk and they’ll tell you it’s all sunshine and roses over there. Genocide Schmemocide! The Armos are dicks though…

From: NothingToxic on Tue, Feb 01 2011 11:13 PM

Scary…

From: NothingToxic on Tue, Feb 01 2011 11:13 PM

She’s really putting herself out there, and I really want to put myself in there…

From: NothingToxic on Tue, Feb 01 2011 11:13 PM

Just stand back and hold the HD Flip, sweetheart.

From: NothingToxic on Mon, Jan 31 2011 2:58 PM

It’s too bad this happened the week before the puberty video in class. You can’t have a boner until you know what one is!

From: NothingToxic on Mon, Jan 31 2011 2:58 PM

I’m not positive what they were about to do with that stick, but I’m pretty sure not measure how tall he is.

From: NothingToxic on Fri, Jan 28 2011 10:17 AM

Before you get drunk, ask your parents how many people have had glass jaws in the family, and assume you’re cursed with same affliction!

From: NothingToxic on Fri, Jan 28 2011 10:17 AM

…and Pakistan vacays just got a little cheaper at your local travel agency.

From: NothingToxic on Thu, Jan 27 2011 10:08 AM

“Those my dryer sheets, mutha fucka! You gotta pay to be Downy soft!”

From: NothingToxic on Thu, Jan 27 2011 10:05 AM

God it sounds like a sheep slaughterhouse.

From: NothingToxic on Thu, Jan 27 2011 10:05 AM

First 48 has taught me that even with this many witnesses, nobody’s talking

From: NothingToxic on Wed, Jan 26 2011 9:24 AM

She looks more like a nineties hot chick, which I must say is pretty damn awesome…

From: NothingToxic on Tue, Jan 25 2011 8:40 AM

Sadly the soldier perpetrators of this horrendous ten minute torture videos basically got slaps on the wrists this week in court.